Self Care - Free Downloadable Workshop


I am a terrible sick person.

A few months after getting married, I came down with a virus for the guts of a month, during which time my energy levels plummeted and I could do little more than lie on the sofa watching TV and complain about how “even drinking water hurts”. 

During this time, my wife showed great love, hustling from her busy workplace each day back to her grumpy and isolated new husband to make dinner as we both hoped that new day would be the one eating wouldn’t be like swallowing glass. It took a while for the symptoms to pass, and I continued to live in the ‘poor me’ mindset throughout that time. (Lucky lady, my wife, right?)

Finally though, the fog lifted, and as I started to reemerge back into the light of the world, I realised how affected my mood, attitude and sense of worth had been affected by the sickness. I had been shown great love during that time by my wife, but I had failed to mirror even a fraction of that love back to her because of the way I had been feeling.

We love out of a place of health and wellness, and when we are lacking in those things in a place of ill health or wellbeing, we can become self-focused. The ‘poor-me’ voice takes over and we can become so concerned with obsessing over our escape from this hole we feel we are in that we have very little emotional space left over for concerns about or movement towards others. 

This doesn’t just apply when we’re physically sick. Each of us makes decisions in our every day relating to how we feel our bodies, our minds and our souls, and with each of these decisions, we move towards either greater or lesser wellness. Think about the difference a 14” cheese crust stuffed pepperoni pizza (extra pepperoni please) has on our mood and emotional wellbeing compared to a somewhat less sexy rocket superfood chicken salad. One leaves us with the energy to sit on the sofa, thinking about how full we are and regretting our decision (most of the time…no one’s depriving you of a slice every now and then) while the other revives you with the energy required to go out and live big. 

We live & love best from a place of health. Feeding our body, mind and spirit with the things we know will enable us to thrive. And many of these things are as unique to us as our fingerprint. A good book in solitude & silence refuels my mind like nothing else, while for you, that might be the very essence of torture, fed as you are by the hustle and bustle of a crowded train platform as you immerse yourself in a new physical experience. We are all different, and many of us have never taken the time to ask ourselves “What feeds me? What keeps me well?”

The below attached exercise is set out as a leader’s guide for a 30 minute exercise to be done with a group, but you could use it on your own answering the questions for yourself if you don’t have a group to work through it with. 

Remember that self-care when done right is never selfish, but simply you taking the time to ensure you are feeding yourself the things your body, mind and soul needs to keep going, thriving in the world we live. 

If you would like WhyMind to come and run this workshop or speak about another issue about mental health & well-being, take a look at our workshops & training page.

If your group is a faith based organisation and you’d like a version of this workshop with an additional faith element, get in touch on the contact page. 


Tom Tate